leonkumquat:

when my dad was in college he had a friend who told a girl he’d take her on a date unlike any other she’d ever been on and so he took her to the supermarket to watch the lobsters fighting in the lobster tank

they’re married now

(via cagedcoasts)

zeloswildeer:

blushyarmin:

lordofthescience:

royaltyspeaking:

How to tell if it was a gunshot or fireworks: gunshots don’t echo, fireworks do. 

thaNK YOU SO MUCH

the fact that anyone might commonly need to know this terrifies me

clearly you’re not from america

(via praiselordjesus)

moseby:

im pretty sure owning a frozen yogurt machine would solve 100% of my problems

(via wetniallofficial)

eidak:

the sound of teenage girls laughing near you when you’re by yourself is literally the most terrifying thing a person can experience

(via somecantbesaved)